My daughters and I started studying together the book of Proverbs last month. As I prayed about the theme of the next bible study, the Lord made it clear that I was to put together an insightful, thorough material on Solomon’s most quoted words. Therefore, using my notes from the great discussions I’ve had with my girls, commentaries, and spiritual insights, I started putting together the first draft of the next Bible study for Soaring with Him Ministries.

Like many seasoned Christians, I have read the book of Proverbs many times in the past 25 years. I have quoted it repeatedly in my writings and speaking engagements.

The wisest man who ever lived, King Solomon, indeed left us the most compelling collection of words on wisdom in three volumes: Proverbs, Ecclesiastes, and Song of Solomon. These words are widely applicable to people of any age, sex, race, or economic status. The collection of universal truths in these volumes is as complete as it is compelling.

Perhaps my favorite trait in Solomon’s writings is his candid, direct disapproval of all types of unrighteousness and foolishness. For the reader with an open heart and ear, Solomon does not pat you on the back or skirts around the subjects.

He tells it like it is. 

And a wise woman should pay close attention. After all, the man is a master when it comes to the female mind and heart. It’s no wonder. Solomon had more experience than anyone else in the female arena. 1 Kings 11:3 tells us that Solomon had seven hundred wives, princesses, and three hundred concubines.”

Lord, help! I can’t begin to fathom the mess!

While preparing my study, I was listing the traits ascribed to a wise woman in contrast with an immoral or foolish one, when I came across this verse: 

“The wise woman builds her house, But the foolish tears it down with her own hands.” Proverbs 14:1 (NASB) – emphasis mine. 

As I read those words, examples of women I’ve met through the years rolled across my mind. 

I started thinking about certain women I’ve known whose diligent pursue of wisdom over folly built solid marriages and happy families. 

And yet, several other examples crossed my mind; women who have become the antithesis of what I strive to be as a wife, mother, daughter, and friend. 

A mother (or wife) indeed represents the heart of a home. 

Our children look up to us.

Our husbands need us to feel valued and respected.

And yet, why is it that we find so many Christian women stuck in a destructive cycle of exasperation, anger, gossip, and negativity?

Don’t we realize that it does not matter how many times we grace the doors of our churches, open our bibles, or pray with our children if what they witness at home is the opposite of what we preach?

It does not matter how many times we grace the doors of our churches, open our bibles, or pray with our children if what they witness at home is the opposite of what we preach? #TuesdayMotivation #SolomonWisdom Click To Tweet

Solomon’s words should make us stop in our tracks… and take a somber inventory of our lives as Jesus-loving women.

If God called you into account today, where would you stand in the following categories:

1) Women who love to pick a fight over every little thing:

If your husband were honest, would he think of you while reading the following words:

“It’s better to live alone in the desert than with a quarrelsome, complaining wife.” Proverbs 21:19 (NLT)

Or

“It is better to dwell in the corner of the housetop, than with a brawling woman and in a wide house.” Proverbs 25:24 (KJV)

2) Women who constantly complain:

It doesn’t matter your reasons, honestly. No one wants to hear constant complaining and bickering!  

“A quarrelsome wife is as annoying as constant dripping on a rainy day. Stopping her complaints is like trying to stop the wind or trying to hold something with greased hands.” Proverbs 27:15-16 (NLT)

3) Women who slander and gossip:

Are you tempted with gossiping? Or slandering your neighbor? Are you a judgemental type of person? 

“He who conceals hatred has lying lips, And he who spreads slander is a fool. When there are many words, transgression is unavoidable, but he who restrains his lips is wise.” Proverbs 10:18-19

In other words, are you building up your house/marriage/friendships? Or are you tearing down your relationships with your own bare hands?

Wisdom is the fuel that propels the words of a righteous woman. #TuesdayMotivation #WiseWoman #SolomonWisdom Click To Tweet

She pauses before she speaks.

She praises more than criticizes.

She picks her battles wisely. And fights for what is right.

She keeps secrets.

She encourages.

She knows who she is in Christ… and does not need to brag about her accomplishments.

Her husband is successful. Much because she believes in him. And he knows it.

Her children are secure in the home she helped to build.

The foolish women?

They tear down.

With their words, actions, indiscretion, perversion or pride. They tear down homes, businesses, marriages, confidence, friendships and even countries.

But a woman who fears the Lord and seeks Him before acting?

Her blessed hands build.

May God help us, Jesus girls, realize that on the day we stand before the Lord to give an account for our actions and words, we will have no excuses.

We won’t be able to justify our actions as a response to someone else’s.

Will you be counted as a wise woman of God?


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3 Comments

  1. I think I will be counted as a wise woman of God! but then sometimes I fail miserably and there’s always room for improvement.
    It’s a wonderful thing when your children rise up and call you blessed. 50% have done so!

  2. I try my best, with God’s help, to be a wise woman, Patricia. Women should be in the business of building up our family and community, not tearing down.
    Blessings!

  3. This was a timely message for me, Patricia. I am desperately trying to stand still while God prunes me. I am trying to put on the armor of God, like in Ephesians 6. And, I am trying to change some deeply set in behaviors that frame me as a foolish woman. But thanks be to God, that he is merciful and patient. Jesus is taking me along during this transformation. If anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation, the old has gone, and the new has come.

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